COVID-19: 5 things to consider before your next post.May 01, 2020
As seen in Medium - published on March 16, 2020
I’ve been very quiet about everything that’s been happening around the coronavirus lately because there’s been so much fear. And honestly, I just needed to sit back and take things in. I’ve seen so much love and generosity; it’s freaking beautiful to see many folks come together! I’ve also seen shaming, hatred, and separation. That’s been heartbreaking. I choose to help shift the latter.
Here are 5 things we can change right now and should probably consider when it comes to our next post. It may not be popular, but it needs to be said.
Those who still have to work for whatever reason are dealing with far more stress than you can imagine. Be kind. It’s costs nothing. A few days ago, I walked into the store to get a few things and I saw a woman at the door cleaning carts and everything else around her. I asked her how she was doing during this time. She said, “I’m scared!” It wasn’t until then that I realized how much worse it was for her than me. I got to leave. She had to stay. And she had to deal with the amount of traffic you’d see on Black Friday. Now, before you say “she should be home because that’s what I would do”… not everyone gets the choice to stay at home right now because it means they’ll get fired. Some can’t afford it. And others are at the front lines keeping you and your family safe. Send “love note” texts to those who don’t have the option to stay home. It may make a super stressful day more peaceful for them.
And yes, some of the posts about the toilet paper going bye-bye are funny, not gonna lie, but you know what? Maybe buying that much toilet paper is what’s going to save someone from going into a state of panic, hurting themselves, or worse. I rather they feel safe and at peace with having what they feel they need to have in their home. They might be dealing with an internal battle far worse than you can imagine and the isolation for them brings up demons you’d never know. Again, let’s just be kind. Reach out to those who might be battling with anxiety or depression. Chances are it’s heightened for them now. Your call or text may be the very thing that keeps them anchored while understanding that their feelings are normal given the circumstance. I definitely had to pivot and refocus on this one as my own junk came up around supplies being down. And I didn’t like it. Luckily, we can all come back and redo.
Those of you that have kids at home right now, be happy that you have them safe at home. Some don’t. Some have lost theirs. And others can’t have them. They’re hurting inside when they read about how you need to drink now because you can’t deal with them being home with you for a 2 week period. 2 weeks is not a long time. Use this time to strengthen your relationships at home. Maybe this is more of a blessing than you know. Get to know your child or children and let them get to know you as a parent. Or reach out to those you know are going to have a tougher time like single parents or caretakers. Gather your resources and share your tools on what’s working in your home and suggest them to those who ask for it. Build a strong community rather than foster more separation. Kindness is also contagious.
Suggestions that are being made are “suggestions”, I get that. And even when it’s a “shut-down”, some will take it as a suggestion. Not everyone will listen. However, your moves are impacting everyone whether you realize it or not. This is not about 1 single person (yourself) but rather the collective. That includes those who shame others for not doing what they’re doing during this time too. Neither is healthy. Say what you have to say, don’t force it. Unfortunately, some just won’t listen and that sucks. But what is the truth is that we all feel the energy behind words and movements made. We’re all connected. Far more than we realize. Check yourself. Spread positivity right now rather than fear and shame. That goes for the many health professionals I’ve seen post too. You don’t know what someone else is dealing with internally and why they did what they did. It might be good to do work around why it triggered you. Now that’s powerful work.
Stay in your lane. I’ve seen so many self-proclaimed experts pop up out of nowhere all of sudden. Speak about what you know. So many of us are getting bombarded with inaccurate information. Sure I can help you work through childhood wounds, trauma, and anxiety. I’ve done it with thousands in person and online because that’s what I know, but this virus is not my area of expertise or in my field. You won’t see me teach or talk about something I’m not licensed or certified in. That’s irresponsible. You don’t know what you could be awakening deep within someone — leaving you both feeling helpless because you won’t know how to get them out of it. Instead, ask those that are in the medical field and share sources from experts with those who ask for it. This is not the time for anything else. People are afraid. It’s our job and responsibility to refer them to those who can help instead of making things up or forwarding wrong information. We all want to help and that’s awesome. Send them to the best person who actually can.
Bottom line: We’re all in pain. We’re all feeling the confusion and angst. Some more than others. Let’s judge less, reach out more, and pray (whatever that means to you) for the collective to heal. Let’s have more compassion and understanding. This goes far beyond this pandemic. I’m all for laughter too. My favorite kind is deep belly laughs to the point of snorting. I’m not at all saying we can’t laugh or drink. That’s your choice and yours alone. Recognizing whether we are acting out our childhood wounds when it comes to our next post, email, or text, may be a good place to start. Myself included!
Stay in your heart during this time. Feel and speak from there.
I’d love to know…Did you, like me, recognize funky triggers coming up for you during this time? Or did any of the above make you think differently? Drop your thoughts below and let’s have a compassionate dialogue.